Mountains and molehills

Source – http://theblueskitchen.com/shoreditch/gallery/

This weekend I surprised myself with how frustrated I got over something so seemingly unimportant. So much so that I’m sat here writing about it.

I had booked a special dinner for a certain someone, and upon reaching the destination, it was disclosed that said person had been there before. I responded with something like ‘are you actually (insert swear word) serious right now?’ Along with a groan, then pursed lips, then a pained smile, and then a passion fruit and gin flavoured cocktail. Obviously said person was taken aback by my response – and rightly so!

Now let me set the context here. This dinner was for a special milestone. This was something I’d researched and booked in advance based on the cuisine and the reviews. This was something I wanted to be a surprise. This was not the first time I’d tried to book something that had apparently been visited or done before. You get the picture. 

I guess I just freaked out because I just wanted it to be special. To be different. And as it had already been frequented previously it wasn’t anymore. In my head at least. Yes yes, silly I know. Sigh.

I mean I didn’t shout or start crying or anything too crazy, but I was visibly and verbally frustrated. Writing this out now it sounds so ridiculous. It really wasn’t the end of the world. But for at least another hour or so all I could think was that I’d flopped and that the evening was a fail. All I wanted was for it to be a nice surprise.

Is it irrational for me to have felt that way? It is a public restaurant after all. It is somewhere that any person and their mother, auntie, dog or parrot could have visited. And I suppose if someone has lived in London all their life, there is a high chance they would have visited x, y or z restaurant. So why did it get to me so much?

As mentioned in my bio I have been known to (cough) overthink things. I’m getting better at managing this, but still a work in progress – aren’t we all?

In hindsight, I had built up that evening too much – to be a surprise, to be memorable etc. I’d taken the time to plan and find somewhere I thought the person in question would enjoy (and don’t misunderstand me here, I loved doing this – said person is worth all that effort and more). I guess the aesthetics just got in the way.

The positive is that said person did enjoy the food (apparently no eating was involved in past visits ha). In fact it went down really well which was great! On reflection that was the whole point right? For an enjoyable meal – full bellies and fun conversation. Even if we had gone to Starbucks that was always the main point. But I lost sight of that and unfortunately my skill at making mountains out of molehills probably didn’t make for the most enjoyable company. For that I’m sorry. 

At least through the whole debacle (which included me squirting ketchup all over the table and my coat!) we were able to laugh and move on. What I have taken from that evening is to keep molehills as molehills, and not turn them into unhealthy mountains. Enjoy the moment and that is it. That’s what matters 🙂

I’m thankful that the person I keep referring to is patient with me and bears with me whilst I work on the above – it doesn’t go unnoticed and I strive to be there in the same way vice versa. 

Going forward – just need to stick to my goal of deep breaths and mini prayers to God for patience and perspective.

Oh and for anyone who’s wondering – the restaurant was The Blues Kitchen – if you like succulent ribs and yummy American BBQ cuisine you will not be disappointed! Enjoy 🙂 

#mountains #molehills #overreacting #ribs #patience #counttoten